what would do if u're in my place? see ur mum suffer from treatments or let her live happily until the day comes?



today is a hard day for me. as well as for my mum. doing chemo is suffering. not just to the patient but emotionally to the ppl around. i've had an emotional breakdown this morning. i don't know what to do. my mum almost give up. she wanted to go home. i don't know what to convince her. to continue doing treatments (which is tersangatla peritnye) or just stop and go home and wait for the day comes (which is probably a few months)? Either way pun i tak suke. i hate to see my mum suffer but i want to see her live longer too.

i'm not good in convincing ppl. i don't know how to 'pujuk' ppl. all i do is just listen and keep her company. of course i pretended to be strong in front of my mum but deep down inside, tuhan jela yang tahu. at this point, i need ppl to support me. thank god, after talking to 2 of my frens (which coincidently availabe mase tgh breakdown tu) , i feel a bit better.

i know i have to be strong. i guess i have to try harder. i have to try really2 hard.
i will be. i hope so.