nothing to do :P

got this from puchi's blog. dh takde keje buat ler. haha.

INSTRUCTION :
a) Bold the statements that are true to you.
b) Italicize the statements that you WISH are true.
c) Leave the fibs alone.

Then, stab 3 people to do the same test...

1) I miss somebody right now. (i wish he misses me too)
2) I do not watch tv these days.
3) I wear glasses or contact lenses.
4) I love to play video games.
5) I have tried marijuana.
6) I have been in a threesome.
7) I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
8) I have changed mentally over the last year.
9) I curse.
10) I’m totally smart.
11) I’ve broken someone’s bones.
12) I’m paranoid sometimes.
13) I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free.
14) I need money right now.
15) I love sushi.
16) I talk really, really fast.
17) I have long hair.
18) I have lost money in Las Vegas.
19) I have at least one sibling.
20) I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
21) I couldn’t survive without Caller ID.
22) I like the way I look.
23) I am usually pessimistic.
24) I have a lot of mood swings.
25) I have a hidden talent.
26) I’m always hyper.
27) I have a lot of friends.
28) I have pecked someone of the same sex.
29) I enjoy talking on the phone.
30) I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
31) I love to shop.(bile ade duit la kan)
32) Enjoy window shopping.
33) I would rather shop than eat.
34) I don’t hate anyone.
35) I’m a pretty good dancer.
36) I’m completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
37) I have a cell phone.
38) I believe in God.
39) I am an adrenaline junkie.
40) I watch MTV on a daily basis.
41) I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
42) I’ve rejected someone before.
43) I want to have children in the future.
44) I have changed a diaper before.
45) I’ve called the cops on a friend before.
46) I’m not allergic to anything.
47) I have a lot to learn.(like really a lot!)
48) I’m shy around members of the opposite sex.(depends..)
49) I have made a move on a friends’ significant other or crush in the past.
50) I have tried alcohol before.
51) I own the South Park movie.
52) I would die for my best friend.
53) I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.
54) I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
55) I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
56) Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
57) I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it.
58) I am happy at this moment!
59) I’m obsessed with girls/guys.
60) I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I’ve ever met.
61) I study for tests most of the time.
62) I am comfortable with who I am right now.
63) I have more than just my ears pierced.
64) I walk barefoot wherever I can.
65) I have jumped off a bridge.
66) I love sea turtles.
67) I spend ridiculous money on makeup.
68) Plan on achieving a major goal & dream.
69) I’m proficient in a musical instrument.
70) I hate office jobs.
71) I love sci-fi movies.
72) I think water rules.
73) I went college out of state.
74) I like sausages.
75) I love kisses.
76) I fall for the worst people.
77) I adore bright colours.
78) I can’t live without black eyeliner.
79) I don’t know why the hell I just did this stupid thing.
80) I usually like covers better than originals.
81) I can pick up things with my toes.
82) I can whistle.
83) I can move my tongue in waves, much like a snake’s slither.
84) I have ridden/owned a horse.
85) I still have every journal I’ve written in.
86) I can’t stick to a diet.
87) I talk in my sleep.
88) I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distractions.
89) I have jazz in my blood.
90) Climbing trees is a brilliant past-time.
91) I wear a toe ring.
92) I can’t stand at LEAST one person that I work with.
93) I am a caffeine junkie.
94) I cosplay or know what cosplaying is.
95) I have been to over 15 conventions.
96) I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical the better.
97) I’m an artist.
98) I only clean my room when necessary.
99) I like a person of the same sex. (close frens)
(100) I love being happy.

last day

so 2day is my last working day at Megah Tech Sdn Bhd. I've decided to start work at Syncoates on monday and manage to negotiate with my boss about the payment.hush hush. :P

tahla kenape i feel inferior plak harini. i always do pun. haih. maybe cuz i feel alone working here although ramai. mcm if i'll go pun, like they care la kan.

why do i have to care anyway? tah pape tah. mrepeks!

yeay!

yeay! i finally got the call from the sg buloh's company(syncoates). setelah sekian lame menanti. haha. alhamdulilah.

now tgh pkir nk brenti immediately or tggu 2 weeks. or 1 week. LOL.

the thing is, syncoates ask me to start work on monday. it seems mcm deaorg nk cepat. but then my boss said i have to pay half my gaji if i want to quit immediately. agak byk ar. cuz klu ikut agreement i have to give 2 weeks notice. but then klu stay pun mcm xde makna jer.

so i called syncoates and mdm kalai said she will discuss with the chemist first and asked me to call her back. so tgkla macamane.

wutever pun. i got the job. yeay!

my sayangs

and i miss u guys too. although u guys dekat je. but susah nk kumpul together rite?

sangaaaat suke ngn gambar2 ini. it just makes me smile. sayang korang! muahx!

rindu!

i miss these girls.rindu!!

stronger than yesterday

i realize something today.

i realize that i have to get hurt in order to be stronger.

i realize that GOD give me pain to make me a better person.

for instance, i think GOD make my mum sick of leukemia to make me stronger. i used to be so lemaah semangat. i cry a lot. i can't stand pressure. i still am actually but i am stronger now. at least stronger than before. i always feel down and then mengadu to my mother. cuz she's the only one who could understand how i feel and she always make me feel better. make me smile again. she give me semangat. but then when she's sick, it's the other way around. i have to be strong to make her strong. although i'm faking it, konon2nye la kuat semangat kan, but i beleive that slowly i make myself stronger.

then there's this hell of an experience during my practical training. beleive me, i felt like i want to kill myself. i admit i'm a bit dependent. and that experience teach me to be independent. and of course, stronger.

i used to be so afraid of falling in love. so scared to be in a relationship again. cuz i've been hurt before and i don't wanna be hurt anymore. takut giler ar. still takut gak but dulu lagi teruk. i keep running away if a guy approach me or if i like someone. i couldn't take the risk. i beleive that it'll come to me. x pyh susah2 pegi carik pakwe. but then, the experience with a guy not so long ago make me think again. we actually had sort of a scandal thingy between us. i liked him and he liked me. but it didn't work. somehow, i don't regret having that relationship with him. i think that GOD bagi i jumpe him to make me realize that the world is wide. go for it. there's nothing to lose.

i remember he said,

"ko xleh camni hana. kalau ko tunggu2, smpai biler pn ko takde pakwe. mmgla jodoh tu ade. tp jodoh tu tak dtg kat ko mcm tu je. ko kene kluar dr kepompong ko ni. knape ko kene pkir bende yg sedih2, pkir bende yg happy je. klu tak jadi, ko x pyh pkir sedih2, ko pkir happy nye ko dpt bertemu ngn org tuh, dpt spend time ngn dea, dpt kenal dea walaupun dea tak suke ko.."

hmmm.betul jugak kan.

and i did kluar from my kepompong. at least kluar la sket beberapa tapak. hahaha. and i beleive that was GOD's plan. GOD wants me to meet him to make me see the world in a brighter view. and yes, to make me a stronger person.

now i'm stronger than yesterday.

(ceh cam lagu britney plak :P)

;>

I realize all my previous posts is all about me complaining.i feel a bit better now. probably after having a few conversation with my frens and family. also after reading a book recommended by a fren and a few articles of inspiring motivational stories.i know i shouldn't be that way.i should be positive.i wanna be stronger.everything happens for a reason.GOD have plans for us.For me.GOD will help me.Insyaallah.

clumsy

i dont know why but i like the lyrics of this song.lagu dea pun not bad.comeel..

reminds me of zaman teenagerku where i can't help it but fall in love with all the wrong guys.is it really love anyway?

Clumsy-Fergie

Can't help it The girl can't help it [repeat 3x]


First time That I saw your eyes
Boy you looked right through me, mmmhmm
Play it cool But I knew you knew
That cupid hit me, mmm mmm

You got me trippin, stumbling, flippin, fumbling
Clumsy cuz I'm fallin in love
You got me slippin, tumbling, sinking, fumbling
Clumsy cuz I'm fallin in love
So in love with you

Can't help it The girl can't help it [repeat 3x]

Can't breath When you touch me, see
Butterflies so crazy, mmm mmm
Whoa now, think I'm goin down
Friends don't know whats with me, mmm mmm

You got me trippin, stumbling, flippin, fumbling
Clumsy cuz I'm fallin in love
You got me slippin, tumbling, sinking, fumbling
Clumsy cuz I'm fallin in love
So in love with you

Can't help it The girl can't help it [repeat 3x]

You know, this isn't the first time this has happened to me
This love sick thing
I like serious relationships and
A girl like me dont stay single for long
Cuz everytime a boyfriend and I break up
My world is crushed and I'm all alone
The love bug crawls right back up and bites me and I'm back

Can't help it The girl can't help it [repeat 3x]

You got me trippin, stumbling, flippin, fumbling
Clumsy cuz I'm fallin in love
You got me slippin, tumbling, sinking, fumbling
Clumsy cuz I'm fallin in love
So in love with you
So in love with you
So in love with you

tolongla..

dilema dilema..

i'm sitting here at the office thinking what should i do today, considering i wanna quit the job.

nk quit ke tak?

ble org company sg buloh nk call ni?

if they call, i straight away nk ckp to my boss.

tolongla call.

luahan hati..

2day i'm not working.

not because i'm sick but because i dont wanna go to work. bolela dikatakan sakit jugak. sakit emotionally. stress. i wanna quit my job because i just can't do it. but i keep thinking nnti ape org pkir. i'll be like a loser. baru sebulan keje dh give up.

i'm waiting for the response from this other company. i really really hope i get that job. a chemist. my fren yg recommend to her boss. they mmg looking for a lady chemist. to accompany my fren cuz rite now she's the only girl. so i harap2 sgt dea call today,but tak call2 pun. if i get the job, at least alasan munasabah sket. ade better offer. but klu tak dpt pun, i think i still wanna quit. but tula, like i said, nnti mcm loser plak. tp klu hati dh tak kat keje tuh, camne?lagi down kang. haih. dlm dilema tul.

these past few days i feel so tertekan. nk crite pun xtau camne. i wanted to like meluahkan perasaan but dont know how. but i'll try here.

i always feel like i'm a loser. byk sgt kekurangan. so ble xleh wat something, i feel so down. mcm ape istimewanya aku nih?smue aku xleh wat. i'm blur, lembab, cepat lupe and sgt lurus. i guess it's bcuz i'm very the jujur person. i hate lies.

pastu slalu rase mcm xde org amik berat psl i. xde org concern. i want attention gak kot. nk perhatian org. nk ade org slalu bg support and motivation. maybe be4 this slalu ngadu masalah to my mum. and she'll be the one yg slalu ckp.."u can do it".., "i beleive in u".., and "saba la, kuatkan semangat, doa byk2". and ble dea ckp camtu, i feel cam..org lain pn beleive in me, why can't i do it?but now ble dea dh sakit, dea plak yg slalu ngadu. so the attention is all to her.nobody really knows how i feel.

same goes ngn kwn2. dlu ade la this one best fren.slalu ngadu masalah to her. she's like my sister. and she'll support me and bg kata2 semangat. but now, since dh ade pakwe, jarang sket la nk talk stuff like that. ade tuh ade but lain la sket.

so tula dea,i feel so alone. pakwe pun takde. haih.

so kesimpulan drp post nih, wa pun tatau. sekadar luahan hati je. :P