ke hadapan mz suhaila thien.

i miss minah kepoh ni a lot.

tomorrow is her birthday. so if u're reading this, happy birthday babe!! haha dah 24. welcome to the club!

i still remember all the good times when we used to always share our dreams and goals in life. and like always counting the years till we get married. everytime birthday je, kire brape tahun lagi nk 'hunting'. konon2 target kahwin umur 26/27. haha. i hope we achieve smue yang kita impikan. now dah jauh, susah nk share2 dah. :(

kahwin la cepat, boleh ktorg pergi sabah ramai2 bah.

i miss u suhaila thien!

Syawal.

this raya went back to kedah as usual. this year a bit longer cuz on 3rd raye we went from kedah to kelantan for a relative's wedding. JEM TERUK GILE BABAS! i'll never going there on raya by car anymore. stres! dahla on the day pegi kedah pn dah jem teruk. masuk kelantan pulaaak, bikin stres. i didn't know the traffic in kelantan on raye is thaat bad. it took us 8 hours from kedah to kelantan, and about 10 hours from kelantan to KL. 10 hours ok! boleh jadi gile duduk dlm kete lame2 sangap nak mampos. nk klua dari kelantan tu pun dh like 2 hours. kluar dr kelantan saje tau. grrrr. tamo pegi kelantan naik kete dah. :(

disebabkan stres yg melampau, i was a bit mad at my dad. sbb tak dscuss betul2 with us the trip to kelantan. i didn't want to go actually tp sbb my dad nk pegi sangat, layankan ajelah. because i think it's not really worth it, pegi jauh2 redah jem pastu pegi wedding like sekejap je. orang lain takpelah, they took the flight. pfft. me and my lil brother was not happy. balik rumah masing2 emo. terus mood raye faded.

but then mood raye tu adelah balik after beraye-ing with my mum's side of the family. pikir2 balik, maybe my dad pun didn't expect the traffic is thaaat bad and the journey is thaaaat long. and bcuz tak selalu jumpe, maybe he wanted to spend more time with them. haih. nasib baik aku masih boleh berfikiran matang. but still, no more kelantan trip on raya by car anymore!


done with the relatives, now beraye with frens plak. c u guys soon!



ade orang tu sanggup datang jejauh nk bagi kad raya. without me even knowing, letak kad raye dalam mailbox rumah. tau2 je dah ade. siap ngn duit raye shape love love plak tu. haha. so sweet! :)

rayeee. :)

wishing u all


Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri


Maaf Zahir dan Batin


:)

ramadhan sudah hampir berlalu...

i think this year's ramadhan i've been better. lagi rajin solat terawih. lagi tak membazir beli makanan. lagi tak banyak melepak. lagi banyak bersabar. alhamdulillah. hihi. proud of myself. except for one thing, barulah ingat nk puasa penuh. skali 'terkena' jugak akhir2 ni. damn.


meh selawat meh.





serious syahdu gile video ni.

God works in mysterious ways.

awak,

thank u sangat2 sbb slalu bimbing hana ke jalan yg betul.

thank u sangat2 sbb terime hana yg serba kekurangan ni seadanya.

thank u sbb tak prnh pndg buruk kat hana and respect hana.

thank u sbb sangat understanding.

thank u sbb sayang hana.

and most importantly, thank u Allah sbb temukan kite. :)

i guess pertemuan itu is the way for me to be a better person. to be closer to God. ade hikmahnya. and i think, i improve a lot.

while i was surfing the internet, i found this doa,


"Ya Allah..jika aku jatuh cinta..cintakanlah aku kepada seseorang yg cintakan-Mu...supaya bertambah kekuatanku untuk cintakan-Mu"



Alhamdulillah.

iftar with the usuals.

after so long tak jumpe together-gether, we meet again! we had our buka puasa at Manhattan Fish Market @ Ikano last sunday (seafood platteeeer sedaaaaap). did celebrate birthdays of the septemberians as well. happy birthday shaz, sue and fadhilah! i had fun, till we meet again for raye!




suddenly rindu gile babas kawan2 lame, matrix frens, work friends, semue2 la yg susah nk jumpe. rase mcm nk ajak smue skali dtg umah for raye. haha.

betul ke?

Your view on yourself:

You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:

Your have very sensible tactics when approaching the opposite sex. In many ways people find your straightforwardness attractive, so you will find yourself with plenty of dates.

Your views on education

Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:

You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:

You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:

You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:

You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.


('get to know yourself better' @ quizbox.com)

fynn jamal.

another awesome poetess.

told u i'm into poetry songs now. (terime kasih ijan & katak sbb pengaruh aku. tak pasal2 aku layan puisi pulak. pasni kt tgk deaorg perform eh). fynn jamal & wani ardy terbaaaaaaik.





"dunia memang kejam, dunia macam-macam"

"siapa kita itu kita, cinta saja jiwa kita, kalau mereka tak suka, pergi mampos tak apa"



deep gile minah ni.

rindu.

tibe2 terdetik,

mcamane ye papaku nnti? bile smue dh kahwin, dh kluar rumah, living our own lives. sape nk jage die? kesian die sorang2. :(

ble pkir pasal ni, mulelah teringat pesan arwah mama dlu.

"Jaga papa tu kalau mama takde, tengok2kan abang, ozair."

dlu slalu menyampah bile mama cakap mcm ni. mcm dh confirm takkan lame. tp smemangnye die lebih tahu yg die takkan lame. sbb tu die pesan awal2. tapi hana buat2 tak dgr. sbb takleh terime. takleh terime dan taknak terime kenyataan yg mmg mama takkan lame. in denial. mase tu pkir, mama akan hidup lame sampai tue, sampai tgk hana berjaye, kahwin etc. kate pkir positif kaaan.

sedih bile teringat. rase mcm hana tak buat ape yg mama suruh buat. rase mcm hana tak mampu nk buat semue. rase mcm hana x dpt jlnkan tanggungjawab.

kdg2 boleh rase marah dgn tuhan. 'Kenape amik die dulu?', 'Kenapa tak amik saye dulu?'. tak suke takde mak. tak best. lagi2 sorang pompuan. tapi kene faham, takdir tuhan kan. everything happens for a reason. maybe nie care Tuhan untk jadikan myself lebih kuat, lebih matang, lebih sabar, lebih responsible, lebih appreciate orang2 yg tersayang.

rindu mama bulan2 puasa ni. rindu suara mama mengaji. rindu cium tangan mama. rindu dengar suara mama membebel membazir beli barang banyak sgt kat pasar ramadhan. rindduuuu.

sekarang hana yg slalu membebel. pfft. dh jadi mcm mama dh ni. scary. tp dh fhm what u've been through all this time. slowly understands what it's like to be a mother, walaupun tak jadi ibu lagi. banyak sgt pengorbanan, mkn dalam. patutlah syurga di bawah telapak kaki ibu.

am still trying to give my best. rase mcm nk suruh papa kahwin. at least i know, later on, ade jugak orang jage papa sampai tue. and hopefully he has a chance to be happy again. :)

hopefully saye juge happy. :)


*

Dalam suatu riwayat dikatakan bahwa orang-orang yang telah meninggal, mereka datang setiap Jumaat pada bulan Ramadhan. Mereka berdiri dan masing-masing mereka memanggil dengan suara sedih dan menangis:

“Wahai keluargaku, wahai anak-anakku, wahai kerabatku, sayangi aku dengan sesuatu semoga Allah menyayangimu. Ingatlah kami, jangan lupakan kami dengan doa. Sayangi kami dan keterasingan kami. Kami telah diabadikan di penjara yang sempit, kesedihan dan penderitaan yang lama masanya. Maka sayangi kami, jangan bakhil kepada kami dengan doa dan sedekah untuk kami. Semoga Allah menyayangi kita sebelum kalian seperti kami.


Al-fatihah utk mama. Semoge dikurangkan penderitaanye dan ditempatkan di kalangan orang2 mulia. Amin..