the sweetest thing.

i just realize one thing.

maybe, just maybe, he/the other half/the bf was sent to me by God to make me a better person.


ok spiritual sangat pulak bunyik nyer. lol.


the thing is, i'm just touched and amazed of his sincerity.

he's so wanna be a good husband to me someday. a perfect husband.

betul, seorang suami tu besar tanggungjawabnya. and dah mmg idaman aku nk ada suami yg beriman dan boleh membimbing aku menjadi org yg lebih baik.

tapi tak sangka la pulak preparationnya begitu dasyat skali. terharu beb.

starting a few months ago, he was constantly learning to be better. belajar ilmu agama, cuba untuk solat di masjid everytime prayers. what's even better, apa dia belajar die ajar aku jugak. so secara tak langsung aku pn belajar sama2 which is a good thing really.

everytime we go out, die suka bawak aku pergi masjid untuk solat. macam semua masjid pun aku dh masuk. ok tipulah semua. tapi banyak la. lol.

he also bought me some islamic books which surprisingly i find them interesting to read. macam eh, tetibe je bagi. pandai pulak tu pilih buku yg sesuai dgn jiwa aku.


sometimes i feel like he deserves someone better, he is waaaay too nice but come to think of it, maybe we were meant to be with each other. bak kata orang, saling melengkapi.

lelaki yang baik untuk perempuan yang baik.

what he did actually influences me to be a better person too. i know i'm not perfect, iman tak cukup kuat, but it's never too late to change bit by bit kan?

i'm also touched that he actually tries hard to find money for us to be married. with his photography jobs here and there, selling his photos online, applying scholarships, jobs. terharu, sangat terharu. i didn't realize he was that serious.

now what i can do is doa and bersyukur. bersyukur sangat-sangat.

moga-moga Allah panjangkan jodoh kami dan satukan hati kami satu hari nanti bile sampai waktunya. Dia lebih tahu mane yg baik dan yang buruk. after all, Dia yang menentukan semuanya.

all i know is, all the things he did are the sweetest thing ever. :)

15 days.

i'm back after 15 days being away. it was indeed the best trip ever. one nice, different and peaceful experience. masjidil haram is the best place to be. balik2 malaysia terus rindu. u can never get that kinda feeling here in malaysia. seronok!

1st stop was Madinah, where we spent a few days praying at Masjid Nabawi. our room from the hotel was facing directly to the mosque. view mmg baaaaik punyaaa but the sliding door to the balcony takleh bukak so x dapat nk amik gamba view masjid nabawi. pffft. the best part/place of the mosque is raudhah, which Rasulullah said one of the taman-taman syurga. sebelah tu makam Rasulullah, together with Saidina Umar and Saidina Abu Bakar. (i hope i get this right. lol. focus makam nabi je.) masuk2 je raudhah tu, setelah berhempas pulas berebut2 ngn mak2 arab yg badan2 besar tu, i dont know why, tetibe je berjurai2 air mata. sayu je rasenye. the worst part is i cant stop crying! sampailah dh keluar from raudhah tu. sangatlah pelik tapi doa je lah. oh apart from that, shopping kat madinah sangatlah menggoda iman. macam2 adaaa. and they're ridicolously cheap!

i was very nervous mase nk pegi mekah. dhlah ngn uztaz tu cite macam2, ade orang x nampak kaabah la, ade orang tetibe jadi ular la. sheessh, scary wei. time tu doa banyak2 supaya diterima. ceh cuak lebih plak kan. we arrived there at night, x silap around 10 or 11 camtu then terus pergi buat umrah. meaning sampai2 check in hotel then terus ke masjidil haram, mase tu dh almost midnight la kot. nampak je masjidil haram dari luar, ya allah cantiknyeee. mase tu dh ikut sorang uztaz yang hensem tu guide. lol. sambil bertalbiah masuk, nampak kaabah terus nangis. sayu, bersyukur, happy. smue ade. but this time leh mengawal perasaan unlike mase 1st time kat raudhah. aneh je. alhamdulillah, dptlah tawaf 7 kali and saie 7 kali. saie tu yg penat! tapi best.

so about a week kat situ, solat berjemaah jela kat masjid tu 5 times a day which is sangat seronok sbb RAMAI GILE orang pergi smayang. like every single person pergi solat. kedai2 pn tutup. kat malaysia mane jumpe camtu wei. lagi2 pahala satu solat di masjidil haram same dgn 100 000 kali solat di masjid2 lain. time suboh, mgrib and isya plg best sbb tak panas. haha. apart from that, adelah ziarah here and there. melawat tmpat2 bersejarah which i mostly dh tak ingat. pfft. nasib baikla ustaz2 hensem tu bercerita balik kisah2 nabi, baru lah dpt recall balik. it was fun! rase beruntung dpt tgk2 tempat2 tu smue.

hm wut else is there eh?

the ice cream and juices sangatlah sedap. enough said.

pak arab di madinah adalah gatal. suke2 je nk buat aku bini nombor 2 and pegang2. ape kes?

byk peminta sedekah kat tgh2 jalan. bukan tepi2 tau. tengah2. ustaz dh pesan awal2, kalau nk sedekah jgn bagi open, sbb kalau bagi sorang, semua akan datang kat kite. lol.

typical things. kurma, kacang, candies, shopping malls dea pn boleh tahan.

i guess thats about it. it was a fun trip indeed. ade perubahan? hm i hope so. slowly bit by bit. insyaallah. and i hope doa2 di sana dimakbulkan. skarang pun, i can see already some of them termakbul. alhamdulillah.

kalau dimurahkan rezeki, i want to go there again. kalau FREE, tiap2 tahun nk pegi. lol.

umrah.

so i'll be leaving for umrah soon. friday to be exact. nervous gileeeeeeee but excited and happy at the same time. all this thoughts came into my mind, 'bleh ke buat ni?', 'layak ke? solat pun tak perfect'.' bende sunat2 kat sini pun jarang buat, diterima ke kat sane?'.

i know i'm not a perfect muslim. sembahyang pun tak perfect, baca quran pun tak pakar. tapi mungkin dgn umrah ni, i'll be a better person. who knows? for me, ikhlas tu penting. dalam apape pun. i'll never do anything just because ppl asked me to, contohnye, mase 1st time pakai tudung, takde sape yang suruh. it comes naturally. i just feel i wanna wear it. memang, maybe dgn pakai tudung pun, i'm still not perfect but it gets better. we can't change drastically kan. at least ade niat.

the 1st time my auntie ajak pergi umrah with 2 of my cousins, niat tu ade tapi mungkin tak terbuka lagi hati. after a while, the other auntie nak pegi so ajak skali, at first nak tanak jugak, then tetibe ade problems with my auntie's passport, kene postpone. at that time rase mcm frust pun ade. mase tu baru rase that i really wanna go.

so alhamdulillah, dapat jugak pergi on this 14th. mmg berharap sgt dpt pergi this few months sbb nk buat in my 1st semester of study-tak bz sgt lagi. kalau masuk 2nd semester, most probably dh start bz, takut takde peluang nk pegi dah. walaupun in 2 weeks time tu, byk keje boleh setel. tapi takpelah, hopefully boleh siapkan apape yg patut before leaving and lepas balik harap2 smuenye berjalan lancar.


so anyway, i wish to apologize to all of you reading this blog kalau ada salah dan silap, terambik duit ke, terambik barang ke, mintak halalkan semuanya. doakan jugak umrah ni dipermudahkan dan diberkati oleh-Nya dan selamat pergi dan pulang. Amin. :)

where would you wish to wake up tomorrow?

anywhere with you.

not really my favourite weekend.

alkisah keretaku,


saturday

suis tingkap cannot function properly. windows stuck xleh tutup. tukar suis = rm135


sunday

handle pintu broken. cannot open dari luar. tukar handle = rm60

(alang2) tukar minyak hitam, oil filter = rm64


total = rm259


sekian terima kasih. :(

p/s: jaga kereta MEMANG macam jaga anak. pfft!

have u ever want something so bad it makes u cry?

these videos just moved me today. i watched the one with the baby story from na's blog and the other one (book of love) is tagged by wan.

sangat touching and sweet.

it makes me feel to wanna be married and have a baby (a family) so much more. like seriously tak tipu.

damn.

i guess when the time comes u'll realize what u want the most in your life huh?

love month.

i dont know why but maybe this love month just suddenly makes me feel so lovey dovey angau mode. and..of course, looking at ur close fren/ex-rommate engagement pics just didnt help. ceh padahal takde kene mengene, nk jugak jadikan alasan. this are one of the moments where i always look back at this. something he gave me when we got together.

and keep on saying..

'ur time will come, hana!'.

and..

'sabar itu separuh drp iman..'

and..

'keje la weih. angau plak!'


LOL